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Now we can hide behind our phones and computer screens and 
totally avoid vulnerability and true intimacy but simply telling 
ourselves, ‘It shouldn’t be this hard,’ and then you move on to the 
next person waiting in the wings. 
Before, relationships were relatively black or white — either you’re 
together, or you’re not. Today, there are multiple shades of gray that 
exist, and as long as both parties are aware and agree, who is 
anyone to dispute that? Relationships today can look however they 
want and the ability to have sexual relationships outside of 
monogamy has accelerated that idea. 
The paradox of choice is that it’s actually harder to pick the more 
options you have. With the advent of dating apps and social media 
connecting us to more than just the people we know in our areas or 
might serendipitously meet somewhere, if you’re thinking dating 
now is harder than it was in your parents’ generation or even ten or 
fifteen years ago, you’re not wrong. 
Additionally, social media gives us the illusion of a visibility into 
others’ relationships in ways we’ve never had access to before. 
Illusion, because most people aren’t posting about that big fight 
they had last night or the difficult parts of navigating a relationship 
through adversity. Yes, dating can be hard—but don’t despair. 
There’s ways to get through it and even enjoy it while you’re looking 
for your mate. 

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